We are generally healthy people. We exercise. We eat well. We don’t get sick often. When we do, as we did last week, it catches me off guard. I’ve things to do, dammit! Sitting on my duff for three days is not on the schedule. Like a fool, I resist. On Saturday I was out mowing the lawn, transplanting basil, sowing seeds and setting up cucumber trellis. All the while feeling like death, cursing Ugly Garden’s existence. I lose, inevitably. I spend those three days on my butt despite my best attempts.

My Battle Station

Being ill is not conducive to our lifestyle. It doesn’t work. Not for our schedule. Not with our food. Normal operating procedures do not apply.

What do you do when all the food in your house becomes suddenly unappetizing? Leftover of bean enchiladas and sausage pizza? *urp* No. Thank. You. Extremely unappetizing even. The Chicken Ladies as garbage disposals got an extra workout. No complaints from their end.

As suburban children of the 80′s, when we are sick we crave crap processed food. Yummm. Processed Food. Campbell’s Soup, Saltines, Ginger Ale. These things sound comforting and they do not live in my pantry. My tummy bug demands salt, MSG, and High Fructose Corn Syrup. Stat.

Life without cable is significantly more inconvenient. We don’t spend a lot of time watching TV. Generally 40 minutes to an hour minutes a day, with a longer period on Friday nights. When you are relinquished to the couch, you quickly run out of viewing material.

There were big plans for last weekend! Chicken Tractors to be built. Tile floors to be ripped up. Not only was I reluctant to let those plans go, I’m now trying to figure out when I can get them back on the agenda.

I called in our personal Medical Professional (the BFF is a nurse) for assurance that we were not in fact dying. We weren’t.

Compromises were made. A series of them. Trip to Red Box for the necessary mass media. Campbell’s Soup was resisted. The battle was tough. We substituted take-out Egg Flower, and packaged ramen noodles. Plus, saltines. And Ginger Ale. I’m not sure that’s any better than the Campbell’s.

There are up shots though. Grocery Spending? Way, way down last week. Turns out being sick is almost as good for the budget as a no-spend week. Processed food = cheap. In case I needed a reminder. In my compromised state, I’m not gonna lie, it tasted good.

Best part of being sick? Moby Dick and the Muppet Movie. There were a litany of other movies and TV shows, most of them readily forgettable. Manamana will be with me for a while. And my free time netted me a good honest start on the White Whale. A fish I’ve been meaning to tackle.

Our sickness wasn’t green. Besides time spent with Kermit T. Frog. Conscientious Consumerism was down for the count right along with me. Luckily, our little infectious disease was unsustainable on all fronts.

What do you do when you’re sick? Are you prepared with a stash of food and supplies? Do you revert to processed crap like me?